She comes to me now as a cardinal, bright red and stark against the Mississippi flora. I don’t see her much, but I turn on a Fleetwood Mac song when I do. She deserves good music, even as a bird. 

I was born and bred in the heart of the Bible Belt. I attended church twice weekly and measured my years in passion plays. With pigtails and ivory dresses, I was the picture of childhood purity and faith. I played an angel in a Christmas pageant, the foil halo catching onto my hair as I sang “O Come All Ye Faithful.”

Anyway, don't be a stranger.

How can I describe my experience? How can I sum up roughly 1,100 days in a page of words? It feels like such a small amount.

There are ways to market films without stripping them of the main parts of their identity. I know that. I just wish studios would catch up.

When your brain is sick, your body reacts appropriately. I am not making it up or over exaggerating it. I am sick.

I’ve skipped more lunches in my life than I would care to admit. Dinners, too. And I almost never eat breakfast.

Newsflash: Not everyone is going to like you. Some people will dislike you before you even meet them. People’s opinions cannot be forced to change. I mean, do you like everyone you’ve ever met? I know I don’t.

My first experience with real, true loss was my maternal grandfather’s passing. I was five years old. Truthfully, I don’t remember much of that day. Most of my memories are flashbulbs that come and go with little context.

My rage against the high-school-sexist-dress-code machine was a slow boil as I walked the halls of my (admittedly shitty) high school. I would occasionally rebel and wear a tank top or *gasp* ripped jeans.

My twelve year plan of undergrad and med school was quickly endangered when I began volunteering for the university paper. I knew absolutely nothing about journalism. I wrote poetry and short stories in high school, ones that never saw the light of day, but always saw journalism as a boring field.

“New year, new me” is a wildly overused phrase. If I had a dollar for every time I heard it, I would probably be a very rich woman. That being said, 2022 was a year of intense growth for me.

Do I take Pine Street instead of Wood Avenue to get to class? That is disturbing the universe. Getting Chinese food for lunch instead of a sandwich is disturbing the universe.

My main grievance came from the fact that I didn’t have an interesting background like the people I read about in books or watched on social media. My world was a handful of interconnecting streets and a run down supermarket.

“I think I’m getting dumped today,” was the text I sent to my best friend the day my (now-ex) girlfriend asked to meet in a place we’d never been to before.

he idea that feminine things are inherently unappealing is a tale as old as time. Throughout history, many jobs were ditched by men when women began entering the workforce (think teaching, nursing, etc.). Even fashion items were labeled as feminine once they became popular.

I like to consider myself a former relationship pessimist. Not just with romantic connections, but platonic ones too. The love I have to give isn’t bad. It won’t push the right people away.